Monthly Archives: December 2011
A YEAR GONE BY
New Year’s Eve five years ago, Neil proposed to me. He popped the question, I said yes, and three hours later he was flying in the air back to England where he worked at the time. For the four years … Continue reading
NOMADS ARE WE
We have become nomads, my daughter and I. Actually, I am the nomad and I drag my poor daughter who would rather stay at home, with me. I could not tell anyone what day of the week it is today. … Continue reading
HAPPY CHRISTMUKKAH
‘Twas two days before Christmas and all through the house, not a person was stirring…because we weren’t there. Instead we were off celebrating Hanukkah. As a Christian, a confused, seeking, Christian who is trying to understand the context of my … Continue reading
SUICIDE PREVENTION RESOURCES – a conversation
This time of year can be difficult for many individuals. For those of you who did not read the comments in the “What if?” post I am re-posting the comments from Fanis and myself here. Fanis provided a number of … Continue reading
BREATHE
Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe in. Breathe out. God, where are you? I miss feeling you. Knowing you are there. But I fear those feelings were just my own imagination creating a false illusion of being connected to you. If … Continue reading
GOING THROUGH THE E-MOTIONS
9:00am: Starbucks – Feeling good 9:45am: Church – Went to the wrong location. No biggy I can handle it. 10:00am: Church – Went to the right location and somehow still made it on time. Sweet! 12:30pm: Friend’s house – Feeling … Continue reading
STIGMA IN A LARGE YELLOW ENVELOPE (or Stigma spelled S-U-I-C-I-D-E)
I checked the mail today. Inside was a large yellow envelope addressed to me from the Regional Supervising Coroner’s office. This envelope, I hoped, would contain some answers about my husband’s death that had been unclear. When the police … Continue reading
TEARS FROM THE SKY
Nine weeks ago I drove to my first bereavement group session. It was pouring rain. Rain came down harder than I think I’ve ever seen it do before. Wet drops pummeled my car and I knew I would be drenched … Continue reading
“I WILL LOVE THE BLOCK PERSON” – Neil
The following is a recording for me from my husband, Neil. He recorded this in April of 2010. This was recorded one day after his sister died. Neil died eleven months later. I’m glad he took the time to do … Continue reading
CHRISTMAS CHEER!
Last Christmas my husband and I experienced the greatest high in our marriage. Our greatest high was proceeded by our lowest, low in Cuba. After that trip, and my not-so-slight melt down on the plane ride home, I drew the … Continue reading