It used to infuriate me when my husband would leave the house multiple times a day to go to Starbucks.
“We have coffee right here!” I’d argue. It didn’t matter. There was something he was getting there that he wasn’t getting at home. Like the Greek myth of the sirens, the mermaid-like creature featured on the Starbucks logo, the siren sang lost sailors to shore. Whether there was something about having the coffee handed to him or the all-inviting culture that drew him in, Starbucks became Neil’s shore.
The meaning of going to Starbucks has changed considerably over the past year. It pressed on my heart to take a moment to write Starbucks a letter to explain why.
“Dear Starbucks.
I am writing to thank you. I used to want to write and say “Give me back my husband please!”. I can’t tell you how many times a day he would disappear to our local Starbucks for a shot of his favourite beverage! He was hooked! Then, around January/February of this year my husband started taking our daughter on dates to our local Starbucks. He would order his grande Pike, and she would get her yoghurt with berries and granola. Every Sunday morning it was their routine to start the morning at Starbucks on a date. My daughter was delighted. She really looked forward to those times.
In early March, the day before my daughter’s 2nd birthday, my husband died unexpectedly. Now thoughts of Starbucks are quite changed. My daughter and I visit our local Starbucks, maintaining the tradition he started. I order my tall Pike and my daughter still enjoys her yoghurt with granola and berries. Every time we go she remembers him and their dates, even though she was only 2 when he died.
Starbucks became the special place he took her out to, to spend quality time with her, and let her know she is treasured and valued. As I take over the reigns in this department there is something about keeping this tradition that helps us remember him. So instead of the ‘angry wife letter’ I thought I’d be sending almost a year ago asking for you to please return my husband because he was so addicted to Starbucks, I now write with gratitude to thank you for your amazing product, and customer service that drew him in because now I realize that visiting Starbucks is like meeting with him again.
Sincerely,
Shawna (32), and Alexis (2).”
A couple days later I received this response.
“Dear Shawna and Alexis,
Thank you for contacting Starbucks Coffee Company. First off, I am truly sorry to hear about the loss of your husband and father. I can’t imagine how hard things have been for the both of you. We do send our condolences.
I have to admit I was touched in reading your letter. I am happy to know that the both of you can still experience a great memory of your husband every time you come into our store. We appreciate you taking the time to write in and let us know how our store helps to keep the tradition that your husband and father started alive.
I have taken the liberty to send a $15 gift card so that your next visit will be on us. Again, I am sorry about your loss, but happy to know that you are keeping the tradition alive. We wish the both of you the best.
I sincerely appreciate your comments and hope you will continue to enjoy Starbucks coffee.”
How cool is that? And if that wasn’t enough, yesterday I received a package from FedEx from Starbucks in Seattle. When I picked up my daughter from childcare I told her that Starbucks had sent us some presents. She perked up and asked, “Is it yoghurt?” Her favourite Starbucks treat.
Packaged with a number of other goodies was another kind letter:
“…It’s humbling to hear about the joy and comfort that Starbucks brought to both your husband and your daughter, and it is not honor that we take lightly. I’m grateful to know that you and Alexis will continue to carry on this tradition.
While I know that this was not the intent of your email, we wanted to send you something special to show how grateful we are for your family’s appreciation of Starbucks.”
I imagine Alexis and I will be going to Starbucks for many, many years to come.
Starbucks has sung us a sweet song and as a tribute to them for being so very human and generous with us, we are wooed. We shout out, “Live on Starbucks. Live on.”
CLICK HERE to connect to another Starbucks tribute for their 25th anniversary in Canada. This link will connect you to a video tribute I created for them. Be sure to stay tuned at the end for the blooper reel with my daughter. Enjoy. 
I am so sorry for your loss. I have not yet had the opportunity to read the rest of your blog but it is definitely in my reader for after work hours. What an incredible story. I’m sure it’s comforting to know that you have a place to celebrate your husband’s life with your daughter.
Thank you Kim. It definitely has become a special place for my daughter and I, and we often talk about how Neil took her on dates there, and she lights up because it clearly, even at such a young age, showed her that he valued her tremendously. Thanks for reading
~ Shawna
First of all, I am so incredibly sorry for the loss of your beloved husband and the daddy to your sweet girl.
Secondly, I am so moved by reading this piece and knowing that you are honoring his memory for your daughter.
Finally, what a pleasure, especially in light of recent news stories about corporations being so merciless, to read about one that takes customer service so seriously.
I appreciate you sharing this.
Hugs to you.
Thank you so much Ashley. I feel so much support from the support of yourself and others. Thank you for reading, and taking the time to leave such a special comment. Cheers. ~ Shawna
I am a Starbucks barista and absolutely almost lost it reading this letter. I am so sorry for your loss and your daughters loss. I am so happy though that your local store is your extra place to go. When I started at the company almost 6 years ago, our motto was to make it the third place. You have home, work, and one more place you go, hoping that Starbucks is the place. In my store we have so many special relationships with our customers. When they have children we get so excited for them, when there is a loss sometimes we are the first people they tell. I know how special our regulars are to us, whether you know it or not, I am sure you are special to your store. We notice when things are different and when people don’t show up suddenly. I hope you are doing as well as you can, but so happy you are keeping the tradition alive. It’s more than just coffee, it’s your third place.
Hi Alisha, Thank you so much for sharing. Since writing my post, I have come to know my local Starbucks’ barista’s by name, and you are so right. When we haven’t come for a while (because of traveling,) they notice. They have made us feel loved, wanted, welcomed, and I absolutely know now why my husband was drawn to our local store. It has definitely become a special place for us, on many levels
Thank you for caring so much about customers like us. It really does make a difference when we see others as extended family. Cheers. ~ Shawna
I’m so very sorry for your loss, Shawna. It’s wonderful though, that you have a special way to remember your husband with your daughter – no one can take that away.
What an amazing and beautiful response from Starbucks.
Starbucks definitely went above and beyond, and deserve all the good will that is pouring out from others, towards their response. Thank you for your support Alison. ~ Shawna
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